I mentioned a few months ago that I had had an unusually violent dream, of being in the presence of a bombing. Since then, I definitely seem to have eased out of the kinds of dreams I had for years (frustrating ones about trying unsuccessfully to reach a goal or place), and am remembering ones that are almost like bad true crime shows. The other night, I dreamt that I was in some very desolate corner of the U.S., in what was essentially a ghost town. However, I must have found an inn or bed and breakfast, and was walking alone in the huge rectangular back yard. There was a single tree in the center of the yard, and to my surprise, I saw that two young men (age 16 or 18) were climbing the tree and managed to disappear out of sight. My first thought was, kind of, "Isn't that charming? I didn't know that kids climbed trees anymore!" However, with the next step I realized that there was a piece of paper on the ground in front of me. I picked it up, and it was a modern "Wanted" poster: two young men, accused of murder, were on the loose, "armed and dangerous". It didn't take more than two seconds to realize, it was the two men in the tree. And to realize that they had seen me, they knew I had seen them, and that they had seen me read the poster about them. I nonchalantly dropped the paper, and turned around and headed back to the house, knowing that I was probably about to be killed. That's when I woke up. I wasn't afraid, just kind of, oh, this is how it will end, whether immediately or whether they will follow me around until they kill me later.
What is so frustrating is, here I am, someone who has arguably focused on spiritual growth for an entire lifetime. Considering everything, I am pretty centered and fearless. I "consume" relatively little violence in entertainment or in life. Yet clearly the violence in our culture is beginning to even get under my skin! It's like a constant level of trauma, leading to a certain fatalism. Why on earth do we live like this?
This is the kind of dream I'd like to have: I'm walking up a grassy green hill to a verdant "tree of life". In front of the tree is a beautiful angel, who gives me a lovely message or instruction about life!! Believe me, the minute I have that kind of dream, I'll let you know!
