Having seen any number of butterflies over this last week on the shores of Lake Superior, I am reminded again of Martha Beck's riff on butterflies (see her blog "Growing Wings: The Power of Change"). A caterpillar doesn't just walk along, decide to grow wings, and then fly away. It is a far more complex process involving hanging upside down, becoming a chrysalis, having its innards turn to goo, then finally transforming into an entirely new, winged creature. Once the butterfly is well-formed enough to slough off its delicate skin, it continues to hang upside down while its wings dry and it acclimates to its new form and environment. It takes some time before it is ready to fly.
Your metaphor queen is resonating with this right now. I am not sure which side of the line I am on -- chrysalis "goo" or brand new butterfly hanging out to dry. In a sense, like a baby nearly born and baby just born, they are effectively one and the same. More than ever, my past and my former creative vehicles are just "goo," and I'm hanging upside down waiting to see how it all, literally, unfolds and solidifies. My new/old city is spread out before me, active in all its mid-summer glory, but I am not ready to fully explore or even to take it in visually. I am relying on my other senses, noticing when the wind shifts and the temperature drops twenty degrees, the smell of the lake contrasting with the dry grass, the sounds of airplanes, bridge horns and birds, and the aroma of wildflowers.
There is only one thing clear to me; this new creature's main purpose will be to tell her story, only in a new way. My blog will continue for now, chronicling my process, but I sense that old-fashioned typing out of words, and pulling out of oil paints and brushes, and musical scores to sing from, may just be too bulky for this butterfly. Some form of expression, light, powerful and unified, is percolating. Until it has fully brewed, I'm just hanging out, thankful to be where I am.
PS: For some reason, each time I read my sentence above, "your metaphor queen is resonating with this," I seem to be seeing the word "resounding." And heck, maybe that is true too.
