Since the word "joy" came up in my last post, it is time to extend my Goddess Words list with it. Yes, it appeared on my original list. As with so many of these words, the dictionary definitions seem to be inadequate. Joy, to me, is happiness times ten. It emerges out of your heart and suffuses you from within and -- in the right situations -- goes out from there to bless others.
But first, a confession illustrating how well I was trained in duality thinking. Tuesday's post referred to how I have entered a new phase in my life, where my dedication to the values of the Goddess comes first. I no longer wish to dilute my personal power by shying away from that truth.
So in the intervening 24 hrs, I was aware of an inner warrior, gearing up in front of a rogue's gallery of men (mostly) and institutions, eager to get fighting. "I'll show them!", this childish soldier was saying. I almost wished She would show up in the world as an enormous statue or hot-air balloon, from which these rogues would run for the hills. Emotionally, there's so much satisfaction in gearing up for a fight, isn't there? I am not immune.
But several years ago, I wrote something in my personal journal which I believe to be true and from the part of me that hears "Her words"...: "I will never ask you to fight on my behalf against anyone or anything, or for anyone or anything." Creating a more Goddess-centered world will not happen in a fight. It will happen, as hard as it is to imagine when every day there seem to be more things to fight against, by being in a place of joy and love and beauty and deep truth and harmony.
Hmm...how to define "joy" in this context? Most of the dictionary definitions seem to refer to outer realities causing joy: people, places, situations that you hoped for, coming to pass. And in a three-dimensional world, it is inevitable that "things" help us define outer and inner realities. But the kind of joy that emerges out of your heart happens more because of inner alignment with Source. For me, it is less a left-brain, logical construct ("I feel joyful today because I always wanted to achieve such-and-such, and after a lot of work, it has finally happened") and more a right-brain one. Joy comes over you so quickly, thoroughly, and spontaneously, it may take a few seconds to look outward and figure out if there was a trigger event. You find yourself aligned with the divine -- and the joy itself is ultimately more important than whatever situations might have helped bring you to that place.
Not surprisingly, the times in my life where I have felt overwhelming joy have mostly had to do with England and church music. On the occasions when I sang choral evensong (regularly for nine months each at Royal Holloway chapel and St. John the Divine in New York, and a handful of services at Lincoln Cathedral, St. George's Chapel, Windsor, King's College, Cambridge, and Canterbury Cathedral), I was often in such a state of bliss that I basically forgot to look at the music, which isn't a good thing with music this complex! I could feel my body vibrating like a harp string, and if I wasn't audibly buzzing, I'd be surprised! It was less a function of my brain going, "Good, I'm finally here in this situation and isn't it wonderful!" and more, my body and soul taking over and basically screaming, "You're in the right place! This is where you belong!" Since I am in that situation so seldom, I have found that other joys manifest a little less dramatically, but my body still takes over; my right hand goes up to my heart and pats it. It happens every time I see England or a cathedral on a "Masterpiece Theatre" production, or "Antiques Roadshow UK", or "Antiques Road Trip". It can happen in other beauty-filled scenarios, too, like seeing a baby, or incredible sunrise, or snowflakes on my jacket. And here's the thing about joy -- you may never have reason to communicate it to anyone. If people are near you, they will see or feel it, but you don't need to explain or argue your joy case, or teach a step-by-step process of achieving joy. You certainly will never need to bonk anyone over the head with it. It simply happens when you are fully being you, with nothing in the way of doing and experiencing the things you were put on the planet to do and experience. It is communication between you and the divine (however you picture it!), telling you who you are, and it is helping to create a more harmonious personal and collective future.
One second of joy, then, is more powerful than any weapon. Truly.
