Christmas music becomes a stickier wicket with every passing year. When you have a master's degree in historical musicology (Early Christian Chant), and a passion for English church music, people assume that you must be a Christian, or at least that you have made your peace with the theology behind most of this music. But I haven't. Although the lyrics to most Christmas carols are a little more palatable in a cathedral setting (than, say, at the mall), the fact is, I now almost literally cringe at the mention of the "newborn king" and "the savior reigning" and so forth. I don't believe in saviors, and it's increasingly painful to move back into a male, patriarchal image of God. Years ago, I wrote an essay where I basically said, until people around the world can at least imagine ringing bells and singing carols to welcome the birth of a divine female figure, our world will remain hopelessly out of balance. The essay remains unpublished...
And this year, I may do something I never thought I would do -- skip the live service of "Lessons and Carols from King's". I love the sound of the men and boys' choir at King's Chapel, and since other prominent choir programs now include girls and women, I can live with this choir remaining all-male. In recent annual services, women have been more frequently chosen to read the lessons, and music by women composers has been featured. So, that isn't my problem. My problem is getting over the early hurdle of listening to a choirboy read the first lesson, about Adam and Eve in the Garden. I've always found this reading extremely troubling, rightly or wrongly interpreting that I, as a woman, am being blamed for humanity's downfall. That a male savior is only necessary because of how sinful I am. It's overly simplistic, but that's how it feels to hear that reading. And hearing it read by a young boy makes it even harder. For a few years, I've considered writing to the powers-that-be at King's, to beg them to find a new first lesson. Yet I know that in a sense, the arc of the lessons in the service does what it purports to do: to present, theologically, what led up to the birth of Jesus, and how Christians came to see him as the savior. I assume that this reading needs to be there for the whole wider story to make sense -- which is even more depressing. So, this year, I think the radio will stay off on Christmas Eve morning.
But I have kept it on a lot recently; it's the only time of the year when classical radio stations play a lot of choral music, and this year, I am hearing a lot of "traditional" carols sung in new musical settings. There was a version of "Once in Royal David's City", played by cellos in, I think, parallel open fourths. A very intriguing, unusual sound. There was also an amazing, almost surreal version of "The Huron Carol"...composers and arrangers are doing interesting things with atonality, harmonization, and instrument choices (and the texture, tempo and mood of these songs), catching you a little off-guard. It seems appropriate in this unsettled "post"-pandemic time...I know I am not the only woman way out in the post-Christian wilderness -- such reboots come closer to reflecting the place I'm at.
