First of all, this appears to be my 700th post. Goodness. Over seven years, I have averaged around eight posts per month, although it is skewed somewhat because during the height of COVID I didn't write at all, not owning a computer at that time, and the library being closed. I am immensely proud of this achievement, and of the quality of most of my writing over time. I am thankful to those who either sporadically or regularly drop by and have a read. I rarely skim the surface of life, so I know my deep thoughts are not for everyone, and neither is my writing! Anyway, thanks to all of you who are literally part of my path.
It's time I return to my list of Goddess words. I hadn't forgotten about it, but somehow the dark of winter has brought on other topics. Over the last week, I have "blindly" picked my "Wild Woman" oracle card three or four times, despite much shuffling and cutting of the deck, so clearly that aspect of the Goddess is trying to get my attention! Interestingly enough, the word "wild" (or "wilderness" or "wildness") didn't show up on my original list. I'll probably include it later on, but today I think I'll look at passion, which is at the top of the list.
This is another one of those words that has a number of meanings, from strong emotions (both positive and negative), to sexual expression, to the last hours in the life of Jesus. As always, I won't try to cover all the bases.
My oracle card depicted a wild woman with long shimmering hair, caught perhaps in mid-dance, wearing brilliant colors and possibly tattoos...it's hard to see for sure because she is in motion. Anyway, a wild woman or passionate woman is probably the polar opposite of the kind of woman I was brought up to be. Indeed, even today, people who know me would be hard-pressed to describe me in those terms, except that I have lived "unconventionally". Someone who loves the controlled sound and choreography of a choral evensong service and who has little interest in roaming in the out of doors might be seen as extremely civilized and unexpressive. And because sex hasn't played a very big role in my life, I'm hesitant to talk about passion in that context, although I know I am capable of it.
And, of course, in the construct all of us grew up in, women have been largely consigned to one or the other polar opposite: virginal, pure, and holy, or a s___. I cannot even write the word. To profess to having a passion for anything, as a woman, can still be quite suspect. Indeed, I think one of my biggest mistakes over the years was referring to my "passion for English church music". It suggests something uncontrolled, inappropriate, possibly even dirty, and I suspect it terrified the very people I was trying to connect with. Passion doesn't have a "stiff upper lip", let's put it that way.
And yet, looking at my Goddess list, a good fifth of the words on it have meanings that, like passion, can be seen as sexual, or at least down-to-earth in a way that might put off some people, and inappropriately titillate others. There is still so little room in our society for the earthy, the passionate, the overtly feminine. And yet so many basic creative acts are earthy: lovemaking, sculpture, oil painting, singing, planting seeds, baking, building stone walls, blowing glass. It has only been with the invention of the computer and everything that has come from that that we have "created" such non-physical, virtual lifeforms. Perhaps my lack of enthusiasm for the high-tech stems from my need for something physical to hold onto...
There is a wild, passionate woman within me, and perhaps in you, too. When passion is twinned with love, I suspect it can move easily through all obstacles. That is probably why we women have been discouraged at every turn from allowing our genuine passions to flow. When it is dammed up, however, we get sick or depressed...I'm going to try to find something uncharacteristically passionate to do today, as gratitude for this vibrant life energy that ties us to the stars! And I'll report on it in my next post.
