Most of us realize that there isn't really such a thing as complete self-sufficiency. We are dependent on our mothers for nine months, then in optimum circumstances, upon our parents or guardians for many years after birth. Through life, all of us are dependent upon a complex web of people and institutions to provide food, clothing, housing, education, work, and all other outward aspects of our lives. Many people like to think that they've "done it alone", but that simply isn't humanly possible. It may be least possible for those who have untold wealth -- do billionaires build their own mansions completely single-handedly? I don't think so.
So what was I thinking twenty years ago when I added this to my list of words associated with the Goddess? I have been singularly un-self-sufficient...when you have low income, you must find ways to live and operate cooperatively. So perhaps I was (back in the "ought" decade) longing for the income that would allow me to more easily (and outwardly) point toward a goal and achieve it, on my own steam.
But as I think about it nowadays, being connected to the Goddess leads to a completely different kind of self-sufficiency. We can choose to turn first to the feminine face of God, that of the Goddess in ourselves, asking Her for answers before seeking outward paths. This doesn't necessarily mean rejecting all worldly solutions, but it may mean understanding that ultimately, governments, medical constructs, corporations, military constructs, etc. don't have all the answers. Sometimes they may not have any of the answers for some of us. Here's an example: I'm at an age where most of my friends are dealing with lots of medical issues, some spending incredible amounts of time at appointments, being tested or treated, and reading up about medical conditions. And this may be the right thing for them -- I just know that overall, this isn't for me, at least not yet! Perhaps I have been fortunate, or perhaps my "fortune" comes from always turning first to the Goddess (considering Her my primary physician) and listening within to sense the deeper meaning or timing of any potential ailment. I don't think that I'm likely to be "saved" by doctors, politicians, financiers, educators, or clergy. My becoming healthier or wiser or more secure can only come, ultimately, from within, then I move outwards to situations that match my inner energy. It isn't a perfect process, but I can't seem to do it any other way.
That is the kind of self-sufficiency I am talking about, particularly for women. When we align with Her, we are rich, healthy, wise, and secure, no matter our apparent outward circumstances. And I think in this kind of paradigm, there is less risk of using other people or situations for our own "gain". There is less risk of manipulating others.
In a bit of an odd (or perhaps, quite appropriate) segue, since I may not get the chance to write again before the new year, I thought I would let you know that I have (uncharacteristically) made a New Year's resolution. That is, to write more often deliberately "channeling" my spiritual ancestress/highest self, whose name came to me a number of years ago -- Beryl. While I sense her as a long ago figure from the British Isles, and as someone who represents my deep connection to that landscape, in the end, she may simply be me connecting as best I can to the deepest wisdom landscape within myself. I'm going to have to trust that when I do this, I do it (referencing above) with as little ego attachment as possible, with as little need to gain or manipulate as possible. I haven't figured out what this will "look like" -- if I will change fonts or just simply try to write from this deeper place all the time. But you will see some kind of change in this blog in its tenth year, 2025. May we all approach this unsettling time with as much softness and resilience as we can muster!! Blessings, all.
