This will be the last post specifically about narcissism for a while, although as you'll see, I think it is at play in almost everything going on in the world. And I suspect that huge numbers of people are affected by it in their home and work lives as well. What I would wish for them is that they discover this fact much sooner in life than I did!
It's as if the lens through which I see the world changed four or five years ago. Whether this will make what I am about to say relevant for others or not, I don't know. But I now see narcissism virtually everywhere:
- in humanity's cavalier disregard for Mother Nature. It's all about us, and hey, if we leave the planet unlivable, that's OK because we can create virtual reality.
- in every form of violence, the use of weapons, murder, and war. Even if (as I believe) there is ultimately no such thing as death, every human comes to this planet with a purpose to fulfill. For anyone to feel they have the right to cut short another person's life seems like the ultimate in narcissism.
- in our culture of idolizing stars of music, sports, politics, and movies.
- in our social media, of course.
Lastly, and for me the one that has felt most painful, our capitalist economy. The castle on the hill dominates the landscape, and it's the only place where the financial "action" is. I have knocked and knocked on the door, but just didn't have the kinds of skills, inventiveness, or addiction-to-conflict to get in. It's almost as if there is a guard at the gate who is the mirror image of my dad, staring blankly at me and saying, "We're sorry, but we could never be the kind of economy you would prefer. Please go away." Of course, the truth is, my eyes glaze over looking back at the system. Nothing about it makes sense to me, seems loving or caring or empathetic. And it isn't that I am a communist or socialist. Those systems don't feel any more love-based, to me anyway. My hunch is that several decades from now, we will be starting to build from scratch an entirely new "economy" of love.
Because that is the question, isn't it? For all of us with some capacity to love,"Where is the love?" (Apologies to the 1970's hit song!) Where do we see it in the news, in events locally, at home? Who is acting out of love, and who is acting out of not love? It's so hard to focus on "love and beauty" in times like this, but it is the only path forward. Narcissists hate love and beauty, and if we turn to walk in that direction, they simply won't follow us.
