First, may I say that I am profoundly grateful that in the larger picture of the pandemic, my experience of the disease found me in my own little room, listening to Christmas music. Many, many people had far more traumatic, or even deadly, experiences...among the many things I am thanking the Goddess for at year's end, this is probably at the top.
I do want to say one more thing about the near avalanche of carols, which came to a rather stunning end on Boxing Day! (Suddenly, near silence, in terms of choral music!) This is it: we will probably never know how many times in the last few thousand years a girl baby was born with the potential to profoundly change the spiritual outlook of the world. Dozens? Hundreds? Thousands? How many girls have there been whose songs were never sung? Whose words have been lost to history? Or who are just beginning to enter our consciousness today? Unfortunately, you can't just tweak Christmas carols...eventually, celebrating women's wisdom will require new eyes, new hearts, new ways of thinking, new songs. But I hope one common thread -- beauty -- will run through these new traditions, when they manifest.
2023. Superficially, it was a rather quiet year for me. With the exception of writing this blog and making my way around Duluth, Minnesota on errands and to see friends, I didn't go anywhere or do anything significant. And maybe that is why I was able to have such a huge epiphany. In the end, my life hasn't been "about" trying to sing English church music, trying to get home to England, trying to find new creative outlets, or even trying to make sense and meaning of my birth family. These were "how" I came to learn major lessons. I think I'll remember 2023 as the year I finally embraced the two major lessons themselves: I have been (all along) aligned with spirituality of the divine feminine, and I have been (all along) "post-duality". There would never have been a way for me to more successfully navigate our patriarchal, conflict-driven culture. While I end the year rather depressed looking out at the world,I am at peace with myself, completely so, in ways I never have been. Finally, just about everything I have experienced makes sense. And events outside me make sense too.
And so a year ends. Duluth remains freakishly warm. This may be comfortable, but it isn't a good thing. It also makes sense, as part of an evolving transition. It makes sense, as Nature adapts to stress and trauma. To my dear readers, try not to be afraid. Be yourselves, keep breathing, find beauty in every day, and find love in every day. "See you" in the new year!
