February 2024.
If you read the last post, you know that this is a defining moment -- for me, anyway. I think it is for the world as well.
I have promised myself that this will be an extraordinary month, a month of growing as far into my Goddess and "post-duality" personas as I possibly can, as quickly as possible. A month of only doing those things that I would do if I were the Goddess. A month of taking no action out of fear. A month of embracing the notion of leadership, if and when I am called to lead. A month of catching my moments of negativity as quickly as possible so that I don't pass them on to others. A month of doing things I genuinely love. A month of writing more powerfully. A month of imagining the future warmheartedly. A month of imagining the beauty and miracles in store for those of us who can hold onto the thread of love and keep expressing it in the world, no matter how humbly.
If you had asked me even a month ago, "What is your 'intersection'?", I would have said without skipping a beat, "England/English church music and the Goddess". It barely made sense, but I was getting good at owning it. All of a sudden, I've moved into a new place. My intersection is the Goddess and "post-duality"/harmony. Someone asked me yesterday to define the latter, and this is what I said: It's the moment when you realize that you see all the contrasts in the world -- right and wrong, good and evil, dark and light, healthy and sick, rich and poor, us and them -- but the word "versus" just does not compute. Your role (if it ever was) is no longer to fight your opposite. To see the contrasts? Yes. To understand what is going on? Yes. To try to hear the music of these different instruments, yes. But to fight, to wipe contrast off the face of the earth, no.
I think what is going on is this -- it's not that I have deep-sixed England, or love that genre of church music any less. Quite the contrary. Interestingly enough, over the last week, I received some unexpected bits of recognition for my role in that world, and it was so gratifying.
But going forward, my twin goals will be to try to express ever more clearly what I think the Goddess is trying to tell us, and to express what it means to be free of conflict and the constant need to prevail against an enemy. Only recently did I realize that this was such a big part of my makeup...it isn't about not liking to fight, or avoiding unpleasantness. It's about realizing that there is nothing to fight. It's about realizing that fighting always makes things worse, not better.
Hard stuff. Challenging stuff. Rebirth stuff. I feel like I am constantly on the verge of tears, it's all so big. But I have said "yes" to the process. I want to move forward, and become the woman I was meant to be. This month.
