The following is what I hand wrote in my journal at around 6 this morning. Apart from a few crossings-out and real time additions, it is just as I penned it:
Today is the day that I share my "channelling" in my blog. I do it with a little continued hesitation, and yet with the world having begun to go completely crazy, perhaps it is the sanest thing I can do. Here it is, the first real work day of the new year, and I am sitting under the covers of a bed in yet another spare room, one whose owners I love and to whom I am very grateful. It is a situation that has helped me feel more grounding than perhaps I ever felt in Duluth, if the truth be known. My "groundedness" out near Lake Superior, and also up on Lake Champlain, was in a large body of water -- in, you might say, the womb of the Mother. The water was ever-moving, ever-changing. It matched my life, I guess! But by age 68, that stopped being a comfort. In these times, that watery restlessness stopped being a comfort.
So as I huddle here trying to keep warm (even in a well-insulated house, this winter's cold winds seem endless!) I'm back to square one. Why would I -- with a Goddess/England/English church music triumvirate of passions -- have not figured out a way to live my life in the logical place? I know I have mulled over this countless times...In the modern world, it seems like it could and should have been easy, or at least easier. Why am I still -- seven decades on -- still "perched" rather than rooted? Temporary rather than permanent? Ever waiting for Act One of my real play to begin? Goddess, Beryl, Guides, Great Mother, please help me.
Liz, dear one. First of all, please know that this cold morning, you are surrounded by countless warm, loving guides who are your "home" in the best possible sense. We know how scary and disheartening this entire lifetime has been, and how little it helps to be reminded of the agreements you made on the spiritual plane before your birth in 1956! The primary one was to intuit how the Goddess would operate in the world, and you discovered that this path is almost the polar opposite to the way the world currently works, inspired, as it is, by the masculine face of the divine. As you yourself have said a few times, there is no genuine "home" for the Goddess in this paradigm. Her home continues to be less a place than it is an energetic center in many thousands of women worldwide.
Perhaps under the surface of your question is the plea, "Please, please let 2025 be the year I go home!" And as ever dear one, we cannot tell you details about the future. But we will say this: a friend of yours once said a beautiful thing to you -- that she had never known anyone who loved anyone or anything as much as you love the Goddess, England and English church music. She's right. Your channel (!) to these three things is wide open. There is a direct line from the dot in your heart landscape where the three overlap to the dot on the physical soil where the three overlap. Picture those maps with a linear arc crossing the Atlantic! While it may not happen as magically as clicking your heels like Dorothy, remember that all the blockages were manmade (literally), and be open to aligning more fully with home "the Goddess way", starting in 2025!
