Goodness, what a summer!
I learned that, just because you may have outgrown a place (or it has outgrown you!) doesn't necessarily mean that it's all over. This may apply to people too.
I learned that, in a situation where you think, "this is silly, I've outgrown this," if you take a deep breath and don't walk away, someone you never expected may come up and engage you in a fascinating conversation.
I learned that losing a sibling is much more painful than I could have anticipated. And, of course, I didn't anticipate it. Still feeling shattered in a million pieces.
I learned that when the Universe wants to give you a little extra space toward re-grouping and heading in the right direction, for goodness sake accept and say "yes."
I learned, for the umpteenth time, that the goal of life is happiness, period. Not happiness "because" (you are in a certain place or with certain people or doing a certain job...) Just happiness. This is the hardest lesson in the world for a woman who spent decades deliberately separating herself from the music and country she loves most. I still fall into the trap that "I'll be happy when I'm back in England and seeing cathedrals and hearing or singing English church music" etc. It's such a high-wire act to focus on happiness in the present yet still hold onto a dream. I haven't figured it out yet, but when someone dies so unexpectedly, it forces you to appreciate a "place" of present happiness. Perhaps we pave the way to a future dream by being fully appreciative and happy in the now. At least you're happy en route!
Lastly, I learned (or came more fully to believe) that we women of 59-and-a-half, if we are still alive and breathing, are unbelievably powerful. Many of us are already experiencing that sensation of being looked through, or looked at quizzically or dismissively. But beating in our hearts are powerful drumbeats of wisdom, power and transformation. I learned to stand up tall and strong in the face of some unexpected life lessons. I learned once again not to be afraid to move forward even if I can't see the path. If no one else sees me, I see me. I'm not sure I could fully do that in the spring. Thank you, summer of 2015!
