Choices, Con't

Looking back, I see that I have written several blog posts about choices. Choices are a particularly big part of American life, especially so in the last few decades, as we have created an astonishing array of products and options in every area of life. When I was a child, my breakfast bowl of cereal was placed in front of me. About thirty years later, I watched my young nieces being offered the choice: "Do you want a bagel? Or do you want an egg?" I always felt on the fence about this. Not being a parent myself, I could never really decide whether these kinds of choices were empowering or just confusing to children. To this day, faced with a complex array of toothpastes or pastas at the store, I'm a bit overwhelmed myself.

But there is one thing I do know. That moment when you "own" your own choices is like the graduation day of the spiritual journey. The moment when you can look back over a lifetime and see your own string of deliberate choices (I chose to go to that college or university rather than this one, I chose to marry or not marry, I chose that company and to stay with it or leave it, I chose to move here, or to live there) is the moment when a surge of power seems to go through the system. And even more challenging -- but potentially more rewarding and empowering -- is coming to peace with having chosen on some higher level the hardest aspects of our lives, even the ones that might seem to be random or "someone else's fault": the place or circumstances of birth, our pursuit of a passion that tradition has excluded us from, an illness or disability or that of a loved one, being hurt by another, or to live during times of political instability or financial collapse. From the simplest cold to huge life catastrophes, it's so much easier to place the responsibility on someone else's door, the guy who sneezed on us in line or "those people" who stole our jobs or whose hourly income is more than our yearly income. It is much harder to step back and take a view from the heavens, and say, wow, I chose this for the good that will ultimately come from it. I chose this so I could make a difference. I chose this so humanity could move forward. I chose this because I was strong enough to experience it and then turn around and teach others. I chose this to remind myself that ultimate happiness comes from within.

Wednesday morning, some segment of our population may be in full fault-finding mode. Yet no matter how the election turns out, it will be the beginning, not the end, of a complex series of societal choices and new developments. I hope maybe we can all "own" the fact that as a culture, we are choosing to learn some new life lessons. I hope most of us will stay empowered enough to remember that our personal happiness and freedom are not imposed on us from outside. I hope most of us will remember to love all our fellow citizens as best we can. In the end, though, I cannot even make this choice for others or impose my perspective on others; my main job tomorrow and every day is to choose as wisely as I can and own every decision, even bagels vs. eggs. I have the power to do that. And that makes me happy.